Crushes, Confessions, and Campus Situationships

Campus Love 101:

No matter where you are in your college journey, wide-eyed freshman or seasoned upperclassman, there’s one experience that quietly threads its way through campus life: the slow, surprising unraveling of college romance. It’s not always dramatic, and it rarely announces itself with clarity. But somehow, in between late-night study sessions, hallway run-ins, and shared playlists, feelings begin to take shape.

Falling in love or simply catching feelings is rarely straightforward. But if I’m being honest, there’s something about college that softens the edges just a bit. Maybe it’s because we’re all in this strange, in-between phase, no longer high schoolers, not quite fully formed adults, trying to grow up, let go of old habits, and figure out who we’re becoming. In this space, dating can feel a little easier. You start meeting people who are at least attempting emotional maturity, who talk about their future goals, and who no longer treat vulnerability like a contagious disease. And yes, sometimes, those late-night conversations do feel like something real.

But let’s keep it real: college doesn’t magically turn boys into men. There are still plenty of emotionally unavailable, indecisive, or straight-up confusing guys out here playing their version of the dating game. And girl, some of them are majoring in mixed signals. You get better at spotting red flags and trusting your gut. You begin to understand what you want and what you’ll no longer settle for. The more you grow, the less time you have for the games, and the more likely you are to attract the kind of connection that feels real.

So yes, love in college can be messy, exciting, frustrating, and beautiful all at once. And often, it starts with the most deceptively innocent of feelings: a crush.

The Anatomy of a College Crush:

To all the girls who love love and find magic in the little things, having a crush in college can be exciting, confusing, and, honestly, a little overwhelming. You’re in a brand-new environment, surrounded by fresh faces, and suddenly, even the smallest interactions feel charged. Maybe it’s the guy who always shares a quick joke in psychology class, or the one you spotted in the library who somehow looks like he stepped straight out of a movie.

And sure, it’s easy to start building stories in your head, wondering what it could be. But here’s your gentle reality check: liking someone doesn’t mean you know them. A crush is just a spark. It’s not a sign from the universe, a soulmate, or a guarantee. So yes, enjoy the butterflies, but try not to let your imagination run too far ahead of reality. Real connection takes time and shared effort, not just good vibes and cute moments.

That said, let’s be real, the early stages of a crush are fun. There’s something so intoxicating about the not-knowing, the what-ifs, and the quiet excitement that builds with every smile or accidental brush of the hand. You start paying more attention to how you dress, doing your hair even when you're “just running to class,” and maybe even creating a playlist that somehow captures every emotion you’re feeling. Every moment, eye contact, a shared laugh, sitting next to each other in the dining hall suddenly feels like it matters.

Now, if we’re being honest, this whole thing isn’t that different from having a crush in high school. The only real shift? It's in how you choose to handle it. Back then, we’d go out of our way to look extra cute or spritz on our favorite perfume, hoping that person would notice. And honestly? That part doesn’t change. But now that you’re in college, you have the chance to be more intentional.

So instead of playing the waiting game or dropping vague hints, why not try something different? Compliment their shoes. Ask about their major. Start a light, casual conversation when it feels right. It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture, just lead with genuine curiosity and a kind attitude. Because at the end of the day, there's nothing more refreshing (or attractive) than someone who’s just real. And if the interest is mutual? Trust me, they’ll notice, and that spark might turn into something more.

Situationships 101: When It’s Complicated but Unclear:

Now, my situationship days are behind me, but whew, do I have stories. One of the wildest experiences happened during the second semester of my freshman year. I was talking to this guy who, in my eyes at the time, was an absolute dreamboat. And yes, I was fully in my little H.O.E. phase (no shame, we’ve all had one).

He came into my life claiming he had the best, purest intentions. And of course, I believed him. We talked for a while, and just when things were getting all sweet and peachy, we had our first real argument. Mind you, this was still the talking stage. We weren’t even officially dating. The issue? He had started getting distant and didn’t seem to care like he used to. He apologized… and then kept doing the same thing. When we argued again, about the same issue, he ghosted me. Just like that.

The irony? We used to talk about how important communication was, how we should always be open and honest with each other. And in the end, that’s exactly what was missing. I laugh about it now, but back then, I was genuinely confused. How could someone talk about love, say all the right things, then leave without even saying goodbye? That situation hurt, but it also taught me how to navigate these blurry, in-between connections. So here are a few lessons I’ve learned, the hard way:

Lesson One: Don’t give your all too soon.
This doesn’t mean you should be cold or pretend not to care. But don’t let your emotions drive your decisions. Take a step back. Look at the situation. Ask yourself: Is he everything you want? And if not, don’t keep pouring yourself into something halfway.

Lesson Two: Don’t chase, attract.
Let the energy speak for itself. You are the prize. If you hand over all your energy, affection, and attention before you’re even in a relationship, he’ll think he has you wrapped around his finger. And the truth? You’re not supposed to be chasing after anyone. Let him come to you.

Lesson Three: Avoid getting too attached in a situationship.
This one’s hard, I know. But the moment you feel yourself getting overly invested in someone who hasn’t committed to you, it’s time to pause. Don’t start treating him like he’s your boyfriend when he’s barely showing up like a friend. Until there’s clarity, keep your boundaries.

And finally, the most important reminder of all:

You Are Enough

You are enough, with or without their attention.
Your worth isn’t defined by a glance across the room, a late-night reply, or whether they compliment your outfit. It’s so easy to let a crush or a situationship become the center of your mental space. But don’t let it push everything else to the background. Your goals, your friendships, your growth? Those things still matter, a lot.

So here’s what you can do: take your time. Observe how they show up, not just how they make you feel, but how they treat you. Are they consistent? Are they kind? Protect your peace, trust your gut, and don’t shrink yourself just to make someone stay. Because if the connection is real, it won’t come with confusion, guessing games, or emotional gymnastics.